4 Minute Warning 2

Your first punk band was Stench, a lot of young punks wont know about Stench, when did they form? Did you get much publicity after the Punk Lives article back in 83? I heard Stench caused chaos at a local midland radio station and even took over the show at one point causing the Radio presenter to have a nervous breakdown? Is it true a new romantic lad who also appeared on the show got duffed up because of mistaken identity, the culprits thought he was a member of Stench? Did you escape from the radio station in one piece without getting nicked by the boys in blue?

A lot of older punks never knew about Stench either and they were far better off staying that way. We were too wild, too limited in our playing and were just a small time bunch of cunts who didn't deserve to get a real career in punk. We formed in the summer of '81, we were in it for the fun at the time and none of us could play very well at all, in fact we were absolutely diabolical. But it's funny you mentioned Stench coz I've just had an e-mail from a punk in Oakland, USA who is a big collector of early 80's UK punk and he said he read about Stench in an old copy of the 'Punk Lives' mag and wanted to buy our 45 off me? So yeah you could say we got feedback from that article but it took over 17 years to reach us (ha!) Yep we got kicked out of Beacon radio station which serves the Wolverhampton area. The DJ couldn't handle our nihilistic verbal, especially when a few fucks were fired around, so they preamuturely cut us short and quickly stuck a record on while we were told to leave. I think someone got a slap but I can't remember who it was, it wasn't one of us. And the security chap threw us out the building once his potted plant in reception got pissed on. We relocated across the road to the posh Newbridge Arms pub who immediately phoned the police coz they didn't want scruffy punks ruining their businessmen decor. No we luckily didn't get nicked, just escorted off the pub premises by old bill. It was all filmed as well but I've yet to see the footage. Our old manageress who lives in London now, has gotta copy somewhere?

As I mentioned earlier we did support G.B.H. but the Blitz gig was a totally different date and time. As it happens Blitz pulled out of their gig at the last minute so the Partisans stepped into the breach, and it was a breach ask Andy Lealand! We also played with loads of other bands who were equally as bad as us but I can't really recall the names. I know G.B.H. wasn't too pleased with Stench coz Jock got his guitar nicked before they went on stage. It was nicked by Anarchy Sid who was a local punk we knew. So we were classed as accesories to the fact, but I never found out who nicked it till weeks after the gig. Oh yeah Jock incidently borrowed Pulex Irritans guitar (the other support band) and proceeded to smash it up at the end of their set which was hilarious. Their good samaritan guitarist was crying as he seen his Woolworth axe disintergrate against the floor (snigger). From that gig on we got a pretty bad reputation amongst the West Midlands punk scene for unfounded dastardly deeds. Drongos For Europe threatened to kill us if we ever played Brum and a couple of Discharge who were in the audience of our Hanley, Vine gig, gave us the dead eye as we made a mess on their home patch. Blood I'm afraid played a big part in our on stage performances whether we liked it or not. If it weren't mine it was someone elses. Actually the blood from the G.B.H. gig was Anarchy Sid's...yeah him again! He fell on some glass and proceeded to stick his cut hand in my mush (Aids in those days wasn't a problem). I've had numerous things thrown at me, even a housebrick was lobbed on stage at one gig. I got stabbed after a gig in Bradfords Palm Cove club and we all got chased out the club by punks who bricked our van as we sped off the car park. They didn't like the fact that our guitarist had a swazstica armband on and coz we come from Wolverhampton they immediately assumed we were racists (Ha!) Scariest abuse we ever got however had to be by schoolkids when we played our debut gig at a local school. They all spat jammy dodgers at us and anyone who's had to deal with 10 to 13 year olds giving it the big one continuously all through the set can inderstand what state we left the stage, they were by far the most outrageous audience we played to. Mad days and dangerous times!

Torcha Shed was wrong from the start! The Stench split up in 1983. I gave up the band scene for a few years coz basically there was no-one around my town who was vaguely interested in forming a punk band. Then I started fucking around in poxy little bands with part-timers, drifters, misfits and general fuckups for what seemed like years, with very little payback! I met Mark Nowhere (future Torcha Shed guitarist) around this period coz he run a rehearsal studio in town where one of these no-hope bands I was in rehearsed.

Then I formed Socially Nasty with Vile Ending on bass and Iggy on Guitar who done a stint in Contempt later on. Torcha Shed finally came about in 1993 with Vile on Bass, Mark Nowhere on guitar and Borstal ex-singer with Contempt who was kicked out unceremoniously coz of his unreliability, he wanted to drum for us so we were happy to oblige. It proved to be another band that was destined for failure. This was mainly due to our drummer problem...we just couldn't keep em! We went through drummers like the pox, about ten in all. We'd get really good and tight then the drummer would leave! I dunno about being popular in Dudley. Vile once told me he seen a punk with our name on the back of his leather when he went over to Dudley but that was it. We were very unpopular everywhere else.

The Original Nihilism On The Prowl 1999 - ( Don't Care collection)

There is absolutely no chance of Torcha Shed reforming ever again. Vile has got married and no longer wants to know, Borstal wants to front another band instead of drumming and I'm 38 now and don't really want the hassle of starting all over again with a new line-up. Jumping around on stage is a young mans game, even I know that now! The fun ain't there any more either for me. Punk bands should call it a day when it feels wrong which it does for me. Borstal and Mark are trying to get a new band together but I ain't sure how it's going. I don't mix with em now the band imploded, they don't use the town centre pubs much. My favourite memories were playing a gig in Wolves Plough And Harrow pub and actually getting paid for once. I think it was about £75 quid which we blew across the road in a nite club. That was fun. I always enjoyed the gigs coz something always happened that wasn't planned and the recording sessions were good especially the last one ('Nihilism On The Prowl' CDEP) which was actually close to how I imagined the band to sound. The rest as far as I can recall was disapointments, frustration and downright fucking boredom. It was a lot of shit to put up with and egoes were always a problem. I seen the flambouyant Mark Nowhere about a month ago in a pub and he still puts me on a downer with his depressing personality. He never drunk in the George Bar, in fact I think he's never been in there. He did write some great tunes though and was a very talented guitarist so respect is due on that score!

You've been beavering away at the excellent Suffragette fanzine for a few years now, were you sad to see the printed version of the zine bite the dust? With the internet taking over will you see more printing shops closing down and make it harder for people to start their own zines, especially when a lot of people still have limited access to the internet? Talking of which hows the Suffragette website doing? Are you getting many e-mail subscribers from all over the world? What are the advantages of having a website punk zine?

I started the Suffragette in 1996 through utter boredom! Torcha Shed were having one of our regular non-drummer periods. I was pissed off doing nothing and I still had a lot of antagonistic verbal to spout out, so if the songs weren't happening I thought why not spit it out in an alternative way so writing my own zine was the next best alternative. I was fed up with what other zines were doing in the name of punk. I thought a real view of the situation was called for. Plus it was great fun and everything just seemed to fit into place really easy. I was very lucky I spose coz the zine just took off spilling a few home truths. It bit the dust in January 2000 after 11 issues

Punk needs new perspectives, new gobshites to create a bit of interest in the drab staple diet we are constantly told is the view from the street. That's why I hope 4 Minute Warning and zines like it are read by more punks coz it can only get better. Zines like this and Puke are essential if we wanna maintain a healthy zine scene. I think it's easier to get a zine out in this day and age compared with say 10 or 20 years ago, coz there are more photocopying facilities about and the technology's superior. But a zine is always gonna be a financial drain on your pockets unless your carrying a wedge and don't need to meet a budget. Small printing shops probably am biting the dust with the internet technology coz you can reach more people through the screen than you could with a coloured printed brochure, which in turn makes it harder for zinesters. And zines have taken a battering over the last few years! Punks just don't seem to wanna commit to putting one out, most fold after a few issues coz it's a labour of love. They just seem to be very scarce and new ones are few and far between which is a tragedy for punks who don't have internet access and are stuck in some black hole like Wolverhampton or Aylesbury or Blackpool. The best zines always come from boring towns with no scene coz that's where the pent up anger and frustration resides. The punks in these shit holes make a point of spitting out the real verbal coz they're pissed off the most. The Suffragette fanzine

As long as there's a pissed of punk I think there will be fanzines about.

Well my web site ain't actually called The Suffragette, it's called Nihilism On The Prowl! coz I like the sound of it! No-one subscribes to my site!!! It's totally free if you have internet access. Yeah you do attract a worldwide audience on the net, every web site does as far as I can tell. I'm in the lower end of the scale I've had over 4,000 visitors in 6 months which I'm very pleased about. When I printed the zine, 4 issues over a 12 month period reached around 800 readers, so the net certainly gets a bigger audience. I don't do a web site for money or a record number of hits, I do it for fun, so subscriptions or memberships ain't needed, this ain't a porn site y'know! The biggest advantage of the web is you can put news up the day you get it! You ain't gotta fuck around looking for cheap printers, you ain't gotta save your giro's either and it's in colour which for me was the biggest bonus. I pay \'a35.99 a month on phone bill charges and my system is out the catalogue which takes \'a320 quid out my giro a fortnight till it's paid off. I was paying that much easily on the photocopying charges and postage fore the printed version so it's an easier, cheaper alternative.

Punk means the same to me as it's always been...exciting, dangerous, energetic musical entertainment with attitude. I don't always get it nowadays and it seems to get harder to find, but punk should never be acceptable, should never have rules and most important of all it should always be honest with itself. If it can grab a few of these qualities it'll never die. I dunno about diy punk coz I hate that tag, it sounds like a very poor, shoddy quality of noise we are supposed upheld for the sake of credibility. I don't care whether punk is diy or EMI! Just as long as it sends shivers down my spine I'm more than happy! There is no future...as soon as punk gets a future we are all fucking doomed just like every other safe form of music on the planet.

Have you seen the latest Sex Pistols movie the 'Filth And The Fury' yet? Do you think it will give an accurate account about the Pistols story, than say McLaren's 'Great Rock 'N' Roll Swindle' movie? I've just got it on video from Woolworth's and I must say on first impressions it's a fucking hilarious documentary with all the comedy sketches and coppers marching about in pumps. As for the story it's pretty much what we know already, there's some great live footage there's a lot of clever editing and there's a fucking funny load of spitting and swearing. In fact it's a bit like the 'Swindle' in the way it's put together...lots of cut sequences, but I think it's good to hear the bands side of the story this time around. It's well worth seeing if you've an interest in the Sex Pistols but I was expecting far more unseen footage. The biggest laff had to be hearing Sid's dad was a Grenadier Guard at Buckingham Palace (guffaw!).

Ha ha ha...no I don't think they should've give him a kicking, he ain't really worth it. He'll probably top himself soon anyway like all these other mixed up millionaires toss pots do, money can't buy you happiness! As for them treating him, I should imagine it was the other way round with him treating them! They probably fleeced the cunt all night for drinks, money and god knows what else knowing light-fingered Jonesy. It just shows you what these so-called pop celebrities will do for a bit of street-cred these days. Hanging around with ex-Sex Pistols must've been a real eye opener for Robbie, I hope he learned something from professional liggers.

I like the 'Love Kills' film. It was a real hard lesson on how smak can destroy ya. I do think it would've been really good if they paid more attention to the facts. Yeah the inaccuracies made yer squirm but that's the movie business for ya, why spoil a good story with facts! Forget the infuriating fake Johnny Rotten...Gary Oldman as Sid stole the show, the best dead ringer I've seen ever. As for Sid doing the dirty deed, well it was disclosed Sid had just received £12,000 royalty payment from Virgin records the day she got stabbed, which strangely was never found at the scene of the crime. Even those two couldn't have blown it all in one day, so I think it's still feasible robbery was the motive? Makes yer think don't it?

Recent????...that was fucking months ago! I hate the way those rich kid anarchists playing at being poor kids running riot and pretending to be for the working class! It's bollox!!! Don't get me wrong I'm all for us low lifers hitting the streets to make a protest but that whole thing is set up by Middle Class tossers who are apeing the poor and playing patronizing mind games. Most of the cunts arrested were either public schoolboys, students or geezers in well paid jobs with a future for gods sake! What does that tell ya? So what exactly do they have to moan about? They can all go back to their cushy lifestyles once the sirens have stopped, and the E's have worn off, bragging to their plumb mouthed cronies how they rampaged through the streets in some peasants revolt. When all it is, is a bit of sport for the young elite till they get bored or voted up on Daddies board or the next gravy train pulls in. I mean what the fuck is that all about? Do they really wanna reclaim our streets for them or for us? I sometimes wonder? Maybe I'm a biased out of touch dolester oik, but I thought it would've been easy to suss out it's just a big politically motivated con. Who do you think pulls the strings behind these actions, it certainly ain't the local punk in a Mohican, it ain't Joe Bloggs the invalid with four kids living in a council flat on the 18th floor on state benefits or a Nurse on the National Heath treadmill, it's some cunt who's dad has got a title behind his name! Now that's what I call real anarchy!...God save yer mad parade. I did think Winston looked quite fetching with the grass cut, never knew he was a grasser as well?

Dance and techno???...are you serious? I think dance music has as much to do with punk as Morris dancing! Those fucking idiots who said rave was the 'new punk' are out their tiny little minds. Give em another E and that'll shut em up. Dance/techno is like one big disco beat and we all know what disco was like in the late 70's...utter bollocks! Dance is purely a 21st century form of disco, just another recorded form of bland entertainment. "And so is punk" the detractors may say, but punk is first and foremost live and in your face! It's real people standing on a real stage with real instruments, not some fucking sampled flashing light DJ! That to me ain't entertainment, that's plastic escapism controlled by a man-made drug. Punk for all it's faults is basically real, it's a vibe you can't engineer, the biggest drug punk emits is from the stage! None of those ravers wanna face reality coz they can't hack it.

Punk in some cases gives us reality in very large scary doses and that's something the clubber could never comprehend. Those fucking cyberpunk anarchists are another bunch of phonies. My god 'Anarchy' is just another fashion statement, just another cheap second hand phrase to use with 'cool' and 'Hi'. I don't give a fuck who's on a major or a minor as long as the music they produce is in your face and exciting who's gives a toss? Punk today seems more interested in who's street-cred or diy than whether the band makes great music or not. "Fuck the songs as long as it's diy and drab!"...fucking hell that kinda attitude ain't what it's all about at all, it's about having fun and breaking away from these kind of petty restrictions! This is what really pisses me off about punk today...it's so fucking orthodox it's a joke!

To tell you the truth I never really noticed any boy bands with spikes, I don't look at the boys I prefer the girls. I did see a kids TV presenter with the messed up spiky look and thought fucking hell 12 months ago that cunt wouldn't have walked the streets looking like that for fear of ridicule, so maybe it's creeping into mainstream fashion now aaaarrgghhh! I really don't know or care coz I've never been in fashion and don't intend to start now. I think we'll have the last laugh on em though, coz they look so pathetic with it don't they? You can tell he's spent about an hour doing it in wardrobe, They'll soon get bored of sticking gel in their hair when in reality all it takes is a handful of soap and Bobs yer uncle...your a punk (ha!) I thought every punk knew that? I think punks should reclaim their spikes if they have enough hair to do it (tee hee) Lets hit the streets, burn the boutiques and batter the geeks! In reality who really gives a toss anyway?